With New Year’s Eve just a couple of days away, we believed it to be more than appropriate to lecture you on the fine points of having a fratty night before and after the ball drop. New Year’s Eve is a time to frat a little harder than usual and the following will help you squeeze that little extra out of your frat gland.
LOCATION:
Any heavily populated city would be the most ideal option for a New Year’s Eve celebration. This is true for a few reasons. First, there are many more party options. Next, there are many more transportation options, such as limousine and taxi services. Also, chances are that your university is in a smaller college town and with school not being in session, you have the opportunity to frat harder in a different locale. Finally, it is more than appropriate to intertwine a New Year’s Eve celebration with your school’s bowl game. Most bowl games are in cities that would satisfy our criteria anyway and what could be more fun that celebrating with your our brethren in a foreign city?
TRANSPORTATION:
In a bigger city where fratty spots are more spread out, driving drunktaneous for miles and miles increases your chances of landing behind bars. Trust us, big city jail ain’t like little city jail. Therefore, arranging for a taxi or limousine for the night is the much more pleasant option. The latter option allows for that little bit of extra frat that you do not have during a typical night of going out during the semester. There is nothing like keeping bottles popping, among other things, in the back of a limo as you move from fratty establishment to fratty establishment.
BEFORE THE BALL DROPS:
There are usually a plethora of New Year’s Eve parties to attend. We recommend making an appearance at one of the more upscale parties up until the clock strikes midnight. A more upscale party should have the following amenities: a large entry fee, an open bar, formal attire, live music, and champagne at midnight. Be the life of the party and take full advantage of the open bar. During the ball drop, you should have more trouble counting down from ten than a GDI would have taking off a sorostitute’s bra. Also, the ball drop provides the best excuse in the world to move in on a Plan A. After midnight, it is time to leave the more formal affair and head towards familiar territory.
AFTER THE BALL DROPS:
Take your limo and head to the frattiest bar in the city. If you do not see at least a few other people in formal attire, then you are probably not at the frattiest bar in the city. The rest of the night should follow a typical night out back at school. If all goes well, you will wake up the next morning with a nameless sorostitute in the bed, a headache pounding you like you pounded other things hours earlier, and about five minutes to call in your plays for the Capital One, Gator, and Outback bowls. That concludes our lecture. Have a safe and fratty new year!
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